Is God an Atheist?

On the phone she said she was born again
and talked about the death penalty
what sins we should die for and how this
will be done

asked what I thought if it had been
my son at Columbine and
the perpetrators lived
I’ve churned this in my head already and
told her of my firm conclusion that really
I don’t know

being a good Christian she said she knows
what must be done
execution, she said, is too swift and painless
they must be made to suffer as Jesus did
an eye for an eye and
a cross for a cross
murderers should be crucified
made to endure the torture and pain
and die by suffocation after all
it’s what they used to do

she asked if I’d like to join
her at church on Sunday
sure, I said, why not
I’ve never been religious but I’ve
been to a few
One time out at this place in Boseman
they had a big light projector
with a live band and an enthusiastic drummer
they sang songs but
you didn’t have to if you didn’t want to
she says her church is kind of like that
must be how religion is done these days

I told her my brother is born again
and I’ve come to terms with that
he finally stopped trying to save me
and relaxed a little
he seems more sure of himself these days
but I’m disturbed by his notion that
only his religion is the right one
I mean after all
suicide bombers believe that too

she asked if it was some kind of cult
no, just born again that’s all
but I find that most believe as he does
that theirs is the only way
she told me that Christ will return
I wonder what he’s going to think
about all this religious stuff
I get the feeling he’d shake his head and
laugh with tears in his eyes
and wonder what next he’ll have to sacrifice
to get the point across

she said she believed that there is a heaven
and there is a hell
both of these places seem a little strange to me
one place wholly good and the other only bad
funny that the two should be kept apart
and to live in only one or the other
for eternity
the whole idea seems pretty hellish really
it would be nice to be able to go
back and forth a little
just for variety

she said if she was asked to die
for the sins of human kind
she probably wouldn’t be able to do it
but she wished she could
I’m glad no one’s asked her to yet

she said she wouldn’t have sex again
until she was married
sort of like regaining
her virginity
she wants to have children soon
before her biological clock
wants to raise them with love and discipline
but most of all
raise them differently than she was

she wants to find a man
who will grab her by the back of the hair
and tell her he loves her and
only her
and wants to take care of the kids
and have bubble baths with candles
and when she bakes lasagna
that he’ll eat it romantically
and she wants this to happen soon
or she’ll have to adopt

when I come to see her though
she promises to kiss me
although her lips are chapped
I suppose I won’t mind really
mine are too